Senior Housing Vancouver, WA: Opening the Conversation

When you are feeling concerned about your parents continuing to live in their home, the best way to address your concerns is just to start talking. Just jump in. It may feel uncomfortable to you or to them, or both, to talk about senior housing. It may bring up scenarios you’d rather not think about. But getting these issues out into the open and getting your parents’ perspective will make your life less stressful later.

Begin by explaining that you need to have an honest discussion and that your loved ones’ input is valuable to you.Here are some suggested questions that can get the conversation started.

  • If the time comes that you are no longer feeling safe living alone in your house, what would you like me to do for you?
  • If I noticed that you weren’t eating well and you were having trouble preparing meals for yourself, what would you like me to do to help?
  • If your eyesight got bad enough that you were no longer able to drive, how do you think we should address your transportation needs?
  • If you weren’t able to do housework or laundry anymore, what would you suggest we do?

It may be the case that your parent won’t want to admit that they are unable to do something  that they used to be able to do. It may be something that seems simple or ordinary and there may be feelings of fear or shame associated with acknowledging the changes. Try for a tone that shows your concern for their well-being, and that this is not about control.

This process of understanding your parents’ needs and future desires will probably take more than one conversation. Continue it over time. You will also need to include your input. You will have to be open and honest with them about how much you will be able to help and how much of the caregiver role you want to take on; how much time you can devote and how much direct care  you will be able to give.

You and your parents may differ on your views, but both of you have valid viewpoints. If you can calmly discuss these issues, it will help you each understand the other and make it possible to come up with a plan that will make you both feel more secure about the future. If that plan includes some type of senior housing in Vancouver, WA be sure to give us a call.

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